i don't see why anyone does drugs

As I watched the first two episodes of 'Grey's Anatomy' thursday night I caught a great quote. If you've seen the show you would know that it's about a bunch of surgeon interns in their first year. One of them gets the chance to be in on a surgery. Later she tellls her boss how amazing it was to be in the surgery room and says that it was 'such a high. I don't see why anyone does drugs'(well it was something to that effect) Anyway I thought about this a little bit longer and well, i'm not going to school to become a surgeon or anything but it's a good though. My week has been so great, and such a good high with out the drugs that I kind of started thinking like that character from Grey's Anatomy was.

The week has consisted of so much good stuff. Minus no job it's been great. I would detail every single thing but that would take forever. The fourth was great, getting to see family and later friends. the weekend before I got to see Davina. After the fourth I just got to see a lot of Natalie and we had a great time hanging out and watching movies mostly. I spent the days looking for jobs and sitting in the pool! How can that not be good?! :-) I kept getting to see people I hadn't seen in a long time and got to catch up with them, as much as I hated talking about what I am doing with my life now, it was fun hearing what everyone is up to. Then I had Thursday and Friday to look forward to. Natalie and I invited heaps of people to go out to Figlio's on Thursday, which is where we have met up with my sister and her friends a few times this summer. It was great! It was such a random group of friends but they all got along real well!!!!! this is probably what gave me the best high! I was so happy to reconnect with old friends, and to meet some new people and to just see so many people coming out to a bar with me and Nat! Life was good! We had old high school friends, friends from college, our friend Kyle who we met in Youth in Government, and a couple friends that helped out with drumline. It was great! Kim was my only Luther friend but she ended up running into other Luther people that I kind of knew. So there was just this really random group of people and it was good. We went home that night feeling so awesome! Natalie and I gabbed about it on the way home and the next day....which was friday of course! The Basilica Block Party! I went last year and it was great, and soooo good again this year. I love the Hopefuls, and all the bands seemed really awesome. There were SO many people there to see Guster. I only do so well with large crowds so I didn't stay to watch them, just listened from afar after I watched Mike Doughty! oh so fun! It was a beautiful night full of good people, food, and music. Who could ask for more?!

I just have this great feeling all over from such fun times! I don't know how else to explain it. I am also happy that I got an email from Britta ( I miss her a lot), a message from Shannon (so excited to see him in about a month) and learned that Greg Graffin of Bad Religion has a solo album! it's very pretty... i like him (check it out... www.myspace.com/greggraffin -- if that doesn't work sorry... but it's the thought that counts)

so yeah... just good feelings all around. I think I also had a dream and friends Beth and LJ were in it. I miss them a whole lot too! just good feelings. Tonight... a party at Rob's with another great group of friends! can't wait!

high school reunion #3

so tonight was probably about the third time that I have gone to a gathering that is close to a high school reunion. Mind you I have not found these events to be disappointing, uncomfortable or completely stupid...but they have been a bit weird. It started with Zoe's wedding where we got some Fridley gossip, then Katie and Ben's wedding, which really wasn't that weird because the people we were with I usually see. Tonight...4th of July... well we went to Mark's new place and hung out, then did fireworks. I got to see a group of people I hadn't seen in quite awhile. On top of that Mark is rooming with Nick and Dustin of whom I was never friends with in high school, but it was just more fridley people. Plus their friends were around, most of whom I recognized. It was all kind of a modge-podge of people. Including my boyfriend from high school who I thought I hadn't seen since freshman year of college, but really not since about sophomore year. Seeing him again made me realize why I liked him. He really is a nice guy. But then I think deeper and realize that we would differ on a lot of things. So not only was the ex-boy there, but I ran into this girl that I hadn't seen since the summer before senior year of high school. I met her at this big gathering called Girls State! It was Katie. She was so cool and we were buds at Girls state but we lost contact pretty quickly afterwards. It was so weird. She asked if I had been to Girls state and i looked at her and realized who she was. So weird! She's friends with Nick (a fridley guy, and also one of Mark's room mates). yeah, wow...it was random but cool. She, for one...is no longer a red head, she's very blonde now. She's still really nice though. So it was good to see her, but the only word I can really use to describe seeing her is 'random'.

Overall it was fun to hang out with that group of people, and I'm sure we will hang out again, but not constantly. I enjoy people...It's interesting to hear what they were all up to, but it was SO annoying to have to answer the question of "what are you doing now?" and having no real good answer while Natalie was by my side loving telling everyone about her soon to be job at Mayo. It's cute how excited she gets about Micro-bio stuff :-) and she gets REALLY excited! ;-)

the day was good overall, a good fourth. Spending time up at my grandparents proved to be enjoyable, but wow did i eat WAY too much food today! :-P Now I have a stomach ache and want to get to sleep. sigh... such a good day.

one year

so this isn't going to be long and drawn out, but it's something I just felt I needed to post.

Mark it. It has now been one year since I left Australia. I left the country on July 3rd last year and made it home very early on July 4th (like 12 or 1am). It was a lot of traveling, a very stressful time in the Chicago airport, but i made it home and was even awake for grandma's fourth of july party the next day.

I'm not sure how much I really want to say on the subject, it's more of a reflection time for me and i don't know how to explain the feelings I have for Australia and its people a year later. What is kind of funny today though is that I was going through my laptop carrying case so that my sister could use it and I found $40! Nice! That's what happens when mom and dad tell you to not keep all your money in one place while traveling:-) I'm pretty sure I remember getting to Australia and after a couple days or weeks felt as though I was missing some money... well think i found it!

what else I feel i need to say is that I loved it, and I miss it... but I am so excited to see friends from that trip this summer. Hopefully Bec and Amber will make it out here, and well about a month or so from now Shannon should be in the states. It will be so nice to see their faces!

nothing much

still no job yet, but i haven't really tried hard in the past couple days.
I have changed my resume and am waiting to hear back from a friend on how it looks.

I'm trying my best to not freak out. Today was quite a nice Friday. So relaxing. Did the usual taking the dog for a walk (rather she walked me) and then cleaned the pool. It's still quite nasty, and well I want to use the pool... so cleaning it seemed to be the smart thing to do.

Life is otherwise quite the same as has been for the past few weeks.

people have come to amaze me more and more. The things they say, think and do just continue to keep me wondering. Good thing I went into psychology. People who don't take into account other people's feelings and point of view.. i just don't know what to do about them. Hm.. Well I had like a whole 'nother paragraph written on this topic but too bad my stupid computer erased most of the post. (it's now a few days later...)

anyway... in general things are going alright. I finally have made a new resume and it's pretty good I think. I have ten jobs that I'm looking at so there's a bunch of places to send the resume out to. That's good news I suppose.

And other than that I'm very happy with my frisbee team. They are great great people and I love my tuesdays! What a wonderful time I have with them. I will be happy when everyone is back after the fourth of July and our team is whole again.

That's all.

things are getting a bit more exciting ...

well first... the Twins won tonight! YAY! 7-5! Thank God! 12 innings...but they won. Thanks to Justin Morneou!w00t!

Now although I've been crazy stressed about getting a job... things are not too bad. I got a postcard today from one place saying that they were considering my resume! Yes! Two... another place sent me their information for me to look over and i think I have to fill out some stuff. It's with the Lovaas Institute here in the Midwest! Yay! Lastly on this topic... AJ's boyfriend Nate is helping me out with my resume and said he'd help me get it out there. Clearly it needs a bit of work. My objective is pretty...well it's too... broad. So I have to fix that, but i'm getting excited that people are considering me! I've gotten random emails about Financial Advisor jobs, which although I feel loved that people want to interview me for that job...it's not what I want. But yay to the two organizations that contacted me! YES! I really hope that I get an interview!!!!!!!! Now I can feel less stressed! It's crazy how stressed I have been. Now I understand how Kayla was feeling when I saw her last! goodness! Natalie had an interview with Mayo today for a research position... she won't hear from them for two weeks! She said she was so stressed/nervous last night that she didn't fall asleep til 2!!! I know the feeling. I've had issues falling asleep lately too! Ahhh ! I reckon it really is just this whole job searching thing. I can't believe how much it could affect me!! whew... again i feel much better. What helps is probably that I have had a couple beers this evening before and during the game...:-) It was such a fun night overall. I am to be out with others, but the game didn't get done til 11:30pm and well i might as well try for sleep.. (shoot I'm rambling)

Other topics. .. looks like Grandma Pat and Grandpa Orv stopped by tonight and dropped off a graduation card for me... how nice! what is even nicer... and I don't even know how to thank them for this... they gave me $500!!!! holy crap! That is SUCH a generous gift! I don't know what to do about them! I feel like such a terrible grandaughter! I don't see them that often and they give me that much money for graduation?!?!?! wow! I think I should put all of that into savings! Maybe now I will be able to move out by the end of the summer after all.! I better not get my hopes up TOO much...if i don't get a job with these places I applied to who have made contact I'll just totally bum myself out... not going to lie.. i forget what the actual job was that I applied to for one of them.:-P i better check on that. Anyway... i guess that money from my grandparents doesn't make me feel too bad now about the fact that I spent $40 on cds this afternoon.. ummm yeah.. lets see soundtracks to Pride and Prejudice and Elizabethtown and then a Jeff Buckley cd. I am too impulsive!

ok i think i am done rambling. Hopefully this excitement won't keep me up! God do I need to sleep! i think that is all i have to say...

disappointed

well here is one thing I can be somewhat happy about:
http://www.startribune.com/191/story/472880.html
It's a comfort to know that the United Methodist Church is taking a stand on gay marriages. Go them! I was happy to read this article in the paper yesterday that said the recent conference for the UMC here in Minnesota recognizes gay marriages and the ordination of gay clergy. I guess I'm pretty damn proud to say that I was raised Methodist. We were always taught to care about others and I remember doing a little study group or something with people at my church and trying to learn more about what our church was about. What came from that was learning that there is a focus on social justice. Social justice definitely has to include, at least for me, diversity also! It was sad to read, however that the UMC congregation is declining. I guess people care more about their own personal relationship with God than doing things for others. I recommend reading the article (the link is above) if you so choose...because it clearly explains things, unlike me.

So that was something to be happy about, but then all of a sudden I become ashamed, disgusted and disappointed with a Methodist. THat's right, our president claims himself as being methodist. After what I have learned about being methodist, I do not find him to be a good one. Oh yeah, and then, get this... he is trying to get an amendment passed that would band gay marriage!! http://www.startribune.com/587/story/473463.html People seem to think that same-sex marriage will ruin the institution of marriage. All I have to say to this is that it is only 'ruining' your very tight-knit, closed-minded, idea of marriage, which seems to be a very Christian based idea. it's just the majority's uneasiness of something becoming different. Heaven forbid there very diversity and differences in this country! Wait... isn't that what we are supposed to be about?! I have to say i am getting utterly, utterly confused as to what the ideals are for this country!I just don't get it. I'm at least pleased to have read in the article that Senator Mark Dayton will not support the amendment. They vote on it later this week.... sigh. i still just can't get over people not accepting others. Gay marriage is not going to ruin our country. All we're doing it just excluding people from soemthing... again! Our country seems to be good at doing that. I reckon I could have even more to say but I'm just... too disappointed and down right sad to discuss it anymore.

lastly.. on a random note. I can't stand sitting at home waiting for the phone to ring. Hoping for an interview... job hunting sucks.

1 week out.

so it's been exactly one week since graduation and what do I have to show for it? Um... not a whole lot. No big accomplishments, but then again I wasn't really trying... But those things that did happen were quite good nevertheless.

I spent most of the week with Kayla and Krista so that of course is always a joy. Most of the time we spent together was in coffee shops and watching movies. We felt that we still needed a break from going out. :-) After Kayla left us we didn't do anything very different. Krista and I spent the days drinking coffee, reading and watching movies, with a short shopping trip in there. THe shopping trip was actually probably a good idea since I have yet to unpack which also means I have yet to do my laundry. Plus it is getting bloody hot here in MN and a couple tank tops are needed. Speaking of the weather...it is crazy hot here today! the high is 92F !! The high around this time is usually only 74F according the the weather lady this morning! Gotta love the crazy weather of the midwest.

From our reading/coffee/movie watching endeavours i accomplished a few things. MOstly in reading. Finally finished "The Dharma Bums" which I put down at the beginning of second semester and finally picked up again. Very interesting book. I have since then picked up "Pride and Prejudice" so that I can get the FULL effect of the story. About 12 pages in (probably) I was already greatly excited from reading it...I'd stop and read a line to Krista and relate it to the movie..."oh yeah...this is that part...where this happens... oh this is different, but i like it!" :-) It was a slow start but I'm getting there. krista and I also learned not to always trust a Mandy Moore movie. "How to Deal" not her best work. I'd definitely go with Saved over any other Mandy Moore movie.

Krista and I then spent Thursday afternoon with her sister Lindsey. It was great! We went to Como Park/Zoo. Walked through the conservatory which was so beautiful and interesting and then walked through the zoo which was cool but also SO sad! I was happy to hear though the next day in the paper that the Polar bears are getting more space and so are the gorillas! But still it's kind of sad to go to the zoo. The Orangutans were the most fun to watch, they were actually very playful and just SO interesting. Looking at their hands, arms, feet, and legs it was just like WOW they really are SO similar. Not only that but they have HUGE arms, legs, hands and feet. Plus you can tell they aren't that stupid, and that they are thinking about something. We then made it to an afternoon movie to see The DaVinci Code. THere was a lot to explain but i enjoyed it still the same, minus the kids who ran around the theatre at the beginning... People were PISSED! haha. We then went for burgers and malts at Annie's Parlour and had a great time hanging out there.

I dropped krista at our friend Katie's on friday afternoon and then I spent the rest of the weekend with high school friends. Natalie and I got together to watch a movie, good old "Playing By Heart" which I hadn't seen in forever. :-) Good times. Saturday (yesterday) was spent getting ready for our friend Zoe's wedding. A group of us went to our friend Amy's graduation party first and then to Zoe's wedding which was very lovely and of course she looked amazing! It was quite a small wedding and very short. The ceremony was very beautiful. Being the psych major that i was i kind of sat there listening very closely to what the pastor said marriage really was. Thanks to Dr. B's counseling class I kept thinking of the things we had talked about in class. At least i know i learned something. It brought me back to this segment that was on the Today show the other day about marriages and relationships. I just remember the guy being a total dumb ass and the woman clinical psychologist saying waht I had learned in class this past semester. I don't even know if the guy had any professional background.. anyway.. he was kind of a doof and I hope he never counsels people on marriage... so the wedding...The dinner was great and the dance was fun. it was a bit of a high school reunion but fun still the same. THere were two tables of us fridley high schoolers and i barely talked to any from the other table. It was fun to share stories of gossip about people from high school that we had heard. Some stories a bit awkward, but overall a good time. We drank a lot of beer, danced, talked went home. Overall a good day/evening.

Now it's sunday. One week since graduation and nothing really to show for it. Britta is in town and I'm looking forward to seeing her today. Tonight is the Gay 90s i think... and that's about it. I wish our pool was full and clean cuz I'd love to go swimming! SO hot out, which also makes me want to do nothing and just sit and read all day. This is my life so far...post graduation...:-)

Graduation!

well it's official..as long as I have passed all of my classes this semester I have graduated from Luther College. Wow... a crazy thought but also SOOO cool. Commencement was this afternoon and luckily it was a very nice day out. There were about 500 of us graduating and it was a good solid 2 hour ceremony. The speech was pretty good and not too long which helped. it was pretty weird, but so very cool. I now have a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology. I got to sit next to Shannon another psychology major and although we were never friends it was nice to have a semi-familiar face to sit next to and chat with during the ceremony if we got bored. She's quite a nice girl. Anyway, we made it across the stage, shook hands, and got an evelope with no actual certificate inside yet, but whatever... I think overall I was very happy but I was also so sad and a bit stressed. Probably more depressed that I should have been but I guess I just had a lot on my mind. Whew... I apparently get annoyed easily. After the ceremony, as we all walk off we go through all the professors, and that was pretty cool... Shannon and I searched out Dr. Bishop and then Dr. Breitenstein, of whose test we passed. He had two sayings that he wanted us to remember, which we confidently went up to him to recited. Both Dr. Bishop and Dr. Breitenstein are great professors and I really enjoyed them. It's so nice to have two people tell you to 'let them know if you ever need help with anything and good luck' which is said with a smile and hand shake and a quick hug:-) And of course after all of that i found the family, took photos and went home to pack, which seemed SO rushed and with which I got REALLY annoyed. Again, packing is NOT my strong suit. i'll not get into that...but yeah basically I felt bad for being such a pain, and well after a little while in the car I finally lightened up. The ride home then wasn't so bad. I tried sleeping which felt soooo good. We almost got into an accident outside of the cities (damn people who can't merge!) but safely made it home. I finally ate some real food, and have just been relaxing every since... the stress is gone, it's done, it's over. Life is moving forward. Now to begin something new... Resumes need to be sent and hopefully a job will soon enough present itself :-) Onward i go...breathing a sigh of relief, and giving myself a pat on the back for a job well done. I made it! Oh what a feeling! I made it! I feel accomplished :-)

finals update: DONE!! :-)

I'M DONE! took my last two exams today and now I am done with my undergraduate schooling at Luther! oh god! it probably won't really hit me till I actually find a job and realize I'm working.

My exams went just fine. NO worries i think. Also got my grade back from my big paper/project in sociology... w00t ! got a B bitches! yes!go me!
Had a really nice chat with Dr. B the other day. he's great, and I'm going to miss him. He helped me figure out some graduate school stuff, so maybe I can figure out what it is I want to do and find a good school for me! YAY!
I still have to find a job... oh well...but I'M DONE!
to celebrate... didn't do anything crazy... came home... relaxed watch some P&P , did dinner, got some beers, got a movie, drank a beer in the library, watched the movie with Justin...hanging out again. I have nothing to do! well i do have to work tomorrow and am going to go talk to another professor about life, but I'm done! Senior week festivities began tonight and I am SO looking forward to the rest of them this week. THe family comes down on saturdy and I have much cleaning/packing to do. kris is already beginning to pack up her stuff. It's really sad. i had quite the 'moment' with her after i read her little letter she left me. Needless to say i cried ("Now that was a moment" --name the movie!)
anyway...that's all. I'M DONE!

finals update: dashing, short skirts, & tp

Two finals and a paper completed! Saturday did not feel like one. It felt more like a Monday. And the gross weather did not help. But after all of that... It was senior dinner night! YAY! So we got nicely dressed and headed to the caf for a 'nice' dinner. It was pretty cool to have most of the senior class in one room hanging out. Such a difference from when we were freshmen and they courted us into that same room to have dinner and make friends. :-P Lets just say that I don't talk to any of the people I sat with at that freshman dinner, except Krista. Although i do remember everyone who was sitting with us that evening. Anyway, the food was actually pretty tasty, and the people a whole lot of fun. People were quite amazed to see me with very long straight hair and wearing make-up and pink! i'm surprised more people didn't try to take my photo! ;-) haha. Anyway, the speeches were decent and it was the first time I had really thought about how I will be leaving and not coming back to Luther. I hadn't had any time to think about it before, i'm still just kind of going through the motions and not thinking about how I will be leaving. So at least the senior dinner provided that for a little while. Again the speeches, not bad. Funniest parts... President Torgerson's speech title "Doin' the Dash". Refering to the dash that you would see on a tombstone between the birth date and death date. we were all confused as to where he was going with talking about a cemetary, and then he got into the whole dash thing. Which we laughed at for the most part. There was some dirty conotation in there that we seemed to find and chuckle at. it didn't help that Krista was giggling. the other funny speech...Prof. Craft and his joke about putting microphones under the beds in Baker. Ha! we all looked at Krista...or rather i looked at her and my other housemates ;-)

After all of this we got 'slutted up' for a party of which we were supposed to dress like our friend Sarah. She tends to dress in short skirts and low cut shirts. So we tried our best, but none of us in the house really have revealing clothing. Marissa had to pin her skirt to make it shorter and really the only short skirts britta and I had were our frisbee skirts. What i learned from this event was that if i put on a bit of make up, change my hair and wear short skirts and halter tops i can attract quite a lot of attention. I have to say that most of it came from one friend though, and it got a bit uncomfortable :-P it was lovely to have friends compliment me on my stylings, but quite another thing to have random persons look at you. It was also a bit disheartening to know that I am noticed most when I change my appearance from my every day look, which I don't find so bad, to make up, skirts and revealing shirt. hmmm. makes you wonder doesn't it?

On Sunday I began studying... again. :-P and I have been since... Sunday was rather funny in that while I was there, the toilet paper in the restrooms was starting to dwindle. The library was running out of toilet paper. It was quite sick in the sense that there had been so many people in the library all weekend for that to happen. i have never seen that happen before in my four years here. :-)

well it is now early tuesday morning and I should either study or just go to bed. My last two finals are in the afternoon. But i must not end this post with out stating what a good day I had even though it was mostly studying... My conversatin with Melissa was amazingly good. I am happy to say that I have found out how much more we have in common and it also makes me quite happy that we can still talk about so many great things even though were are in different hemispheres and on opposite sides of the world. :-) I look forward to seeing her again soon, and hopefully it is as we have planned with backpacks in tow, running around Europe together. :-)

lastly, instead of studying like mad this evening...of which I wouldn't have been able to do because I was so bored with studying by dinner time... I took the time to just relax a little and watch a movie with Krista. I can't express how much I love Pride and Prejudice. It is such a wonderful story and definitely my favorite love story. I feel Romeo and Juliet have nothing on Elizabeth Bennett and Marc Darcy. :-)

finals update: who the hell put finals on a saturday?!

well, i can't wait for tomorrow (actually today...saturday) to end. Who the hell puts finals on a saturday?! argh! I have two tomorrow plus a paper due. All I can say is that I will be happy to finish those. I have been in the library most of the day today since about 1 or 2 and now with about half an hour left of the library being open, i get restless...

I still have about two sections of my paper to type up, one of which hopefully will be small, but I'm almost to 8 pages already! gross! I have yet to study for my sociology final at 10:15 am, which should be interesting... I guess I just have a really laid back, not caring attitude about that class and so I'll probably review the article tonight, stress out, look at it again in the morning, along with reviewing some terms and such and just go take the stupid thing. I really don't even want to waste two hours on it. I could be studying for my psych exam and fixing up my paper instead. oh well. by 12:15 that class will be OFFICIALLY OVER! thank god! I probably could have done more last night but with the housemates getting a bit drunk, and getting phone calls from a drunk sister, and being woken up by a neighbor being locked out of his house... not much got done.

I am really hoping that my psych exam tomorrow will not be too horrible. I think I have most of it down.. whew. It's only about 50 points so it's hard to imagine what exactly will be on it.

Anyway it looks to be a long night still. once home I will glue myself to a chair to finish the paper and to study that stupid article. Oh I don't even want to show up for that soc exam! augh! Ok ok, i'm done bitching, but again...who the hell puts finals on a saturday..?!

last day of classes

today was my last day of class at Luther.
I kind of wish it had been more exciting. I had my one class, Soc Research Methods.
Today just made me realize how much I really did not like this class. Overall it was kind of an anticlimatic day. Yesterday had more feeling. Anyway I went to class with a beer in me and some gin and soda in my hand. Class didn't go for long but after discussing the final i felt like wanting to hit our professor. Needless to say, i came home in the crappy weather and went to bed for a bit. It was SO windy today! So really... a "meh" kind of day. Not that i was hoping for a song and balloons or something, but having the one class made it ... eh... not that cool. Oh but it should be celebrated that I am done with my undergraduate education here at Luther college! w00t! Tonight you'd think I'd be out getting quite drunk but with a paper and two exams scheduled for Saturday...ummm... yeah I should get working on that. Granted I have all day tomorrow to do stuff... I'm also being good and getting up for work in the morning. I really should have said i wasn't going to be there, but I'm going...:-P Might as well get as much money as I can from this college.

A good thing though.. The presentation is done, and it went pretty well even though I was so scared I wasn't going to be able to explain anything very well. Joanna, my partner, told me that we got full points! YES! so I am pretty sure I can pass this class even if the test doesn't go that well and the paper.

it's all so crazy... life at Luther is ending soon... I'm excited to go home and be near people i haven't seen in awhile, and I think it will be so great to come down to visit sometime... that is all. Maybe I should start my studying now.

quick weekend

so a quick one.
-there are medlers in my midst. people who keep suggesting i do certain things. I feel like I can't please them. They had a new idea for my future...future love life again today! it's weird, i don't know what to tell them. except to worry more about their future than mine. ANd I STILL maintain that I will NOT be the first to get engaged/married!

-the weekend was great. Some fun frisbee, great weather, great friends, great partying along with all of that! YAY! I played a beer point! what a crowning moment in my frisbee career! i can die happy now! (I even caught the frisbee one-handed while playing with the beer in hand!)

-the whole homework thing didn't really pan out for me. Nodding off while reading doesn't really work. It was a bit discouraging, but my senioritis tells me not to care.

-Amber is going to Adelaide again in June. I'm so happy for her, but SO jealous at the same time. Not fair! sigh... she gets to see everyone! That will be so much fun and I wish i could go with her, but probably won't be able to. But to look on the bright side of things, I might be going to NY to see Blair, that is more feasible for me than Australia again. i miss Australia friends!

-class ends this coming thursday. I don't know what to do with myself! ekk! excited, but sad. i really enjoyed my psych classes this semester and I will miss those professors. It has been a good end to my college career. Senior week is what I look forward to now after finals are over. Then moving back home, zoe's wedding, hopefully NY, and finding a job. Oh and I get to play ultimate in a league this summer too! SO pumped!

well life must go on.

could the rain please stop now?
well after a weekend full of rain and frisbee... i'm pooped. Oh regionals...
we played all day saturday in the rain, wind, and cold. What an experience. One of the frisbee girls was awesome enough to let us stay at her place, which we basically trashed, but no worries we did clean it up. But a group of 16 girls with wet, grassy clothes? that makes quite the mess. The weekend was good besides crappy weather. We played quite well but there were some upsets. Happily i got to see Will and he is always SO calm about frisbee so that made me feel ten times better, plus it was just nice to see him again.

well before the weekend, exciting things happened...like... turning in my senior paper. I almost can't believe it's done. It wasn't as crazy and stressful as I thought it was going to be, which is nice, but yeah, it's done. WOW. I turned it in Friday afternoon, after realizing I probably needed an abstract which I quickly typed up and then print, and off to the registrar to turn it in, sign the posterboard, and grab a sticker. Oh sweet day. After that? celebration! well first it was off to two more classes, but whatever. I took a drink right after I turned in the paper and kept on doing so the rest of the day. I was hitting the 5 o'clock by 11! Oh cheap vodka... One of my favorite memories from the day.. 4pm. I met up with Leah and Britta to hang out on the steps of Main to watch kids turn their papers in with in the last hour... nothing too exciting happened, but it was still pretty cool. We sat and drank and visited with friends who came and went. Watched some of the frisbee guys burn their rough drafts. That was exciting. i lent them some vodka to get the fire going. What was my favorite memory by far though was at 5 o'clock when the papers were due, out came the 5 o'clock Vodka and Leah, Britta and I all took shots on the steps of Main. That has got to be one funny memory.

And that is my life for now. Have a project due tomorrow that I'm finishing up tonight. Well basically doing all of it tonight, but it's alright, nothing else due tomorrow. Two weeks of class left, then it's reading day, finals for me on saturday and tuesday and then I'm done! I feel like this went by SO Fast! crazy crazy year! I am hoping that I will find a job, but that hasn't happened yet, have some resumes to turn in this week and hopefully I will hear something. But if not, the plans are to take a couple weeks off after graduation. Go to Zoe's wedding the weekend after graduation and then maybe out to see Blair! I hope these plans work out!!!! I miss Australia friends so much! It's almost been a year since I was there and it's kind of hard to believe. whew!

oh and Mel and Mike... I'll do my best with the England thing... I'm actually planning on talking to a professor about it and maybe the study abroad office to see what they have to say. i think it would be sooo cool. :-) much love

anyone know a good school in Eurpoe?!

so after conversation with my partner and my professor after Tests and Measurement today I have begun to consider how cool it would be to go to Europe, preferably England, and get a graduate education over there. See the thing is how they view psychology a bit differently and i think it would be super cool to experience that! yay for awesome professors who make you think!

that's all i've got. not going into detail, but yeah i want to go to England for grad school. I'm really tired right now but going crazy from caffeine I think. It's 2:30am..!

the daffodils are blooming.

ok so the daffodils have been blooming for over a week or two now, but I just haven't gotten around to writing about them until now.

Spring is finally here and it is LOVELY. I am enjoying the daffodils next to Valders Hall of science and the green grass. Just got back from Easter Break today and saw that the grass looked even greener and that more plants were starting to sprout. Plus the trees have green sprouting on them again too. Back at home the same things were happening. I was pretty excited to see that the Lilac bush outside my window was starting to bud. I hope that the lilacs are still there and smelling good in May when I go home again! (last time I'll have to move out!)

Well also because of the beautiful weather, I can now start wearing skirts! w00t! I love my three skirts that i own so I've been looking forward to the warm weather so that I can wear them. I wore one last week and got three comments on it by 10:30 am! how nice! definitely made my day. I love that skirt! It's funny cuz it's nothing special, it's from Target a store that everyone probably goes to! Anyway...

now that I'm back at school the next two weeks are going to be HELL! gross! Senior paper is due on the 28th and i have three exams this week! augh! But happily after this week no more exams til finals which will be nice and I don't have any crazy final projects to work on. I think I like it more when I just have exams to study for.

SO Easter weekend was nice. Very relaxing and was spent mostly with the family. Ate way too much food again on Sunday but it was good and I had fun helping make the food. It was also quite nice to be at home and not have to go to grandma's although that makes me feel bad that I didn't care much that i didn't see the rest of the family. Oh well... After dinner we watched the ball game on tv and spent the evening just being lazy. I probably should have gone for a walk but really... laziness was more in the cards. That was about it.
I am sure that I have more important or possibly meaningful things to say but I'll save them since I should be working on an assignment or sleeping. mmmm sleep! Oh how I love thee! That is all...

the rest of spring break and so on...

so after 11 hours of traveling home from st. louis i spent the rest of the week doing pretty much nothing... So it was quite the relaxing spring break. I drank a whole lot of coffee, tried to work on my senior paper a bit and hung out with friends. My favorite nights were seeing Lauren, Kim and Will, having coffee with them and getting a chance to catch up. I can't wait to be in Minneapolis again and have the chance to hang out with them more. They are great great people. The other great night was hanging out with my sister, colleen and mike and having a few beers. It was pretty simple, but it was pretty good. Kris spent the night on friday and we watched movies and Lauren came over to watch movies the next day, then it was back to Luther. Mom and Dad brought me down which was nice cuz dad was gone most of the week because of work. On top of all of that i watched some pretty ridiculous tv. enough said.


since break... I spent sunday evening and monday morning freaking out about school and trying to catch up on assignments and readings. Happily I got them done and since Monday things have been good. I feel at ease about school again. My work is getting done and i don't feel too busy. Wednesday was a great great day because it was SO nice out! it felt like a friday not only because of the weather but so many people were just outside hanging out, having fun and there was a bbq for the seniors at the commons just up the hill from us. I love living in Baker Village here on campus and i love the atmosphere of friends! :-) Part of me can not wait to graduate and yet there is still a part of me that longs for the community of Luther College.

speaking of graduating... i've picked up my cap and gown, along with my tickets...it's getting weirder and weirder...so many things to do and so many responsibilities! :-P eek! But it's also a good feeling, kind of. It makes me feel older and the responsibility factor makes me feel good sometimes, like I'm actually doing something, and getting things done! I had a career center meeting again today and it went really well. Thank god I had them look at my cover letter! My wording was terrible! Anyway, so things are progressing along there and i keep looking for jobs but boy does my resume need some tweeking!

On kind of a sadder, more downer note... Although i feel like I am playing my heart out and that I'm in some of the best shape that i have been for frisbee, the start of the spring season has been really hard. People aren't showing up to practices so we can't get our act together! ugh! Today was our last practice before sectionals which are this coming weekend. Let's just say some of us are scared that we may not make it to regionals and well personally i REALLY want to keep playing because of the fact that if eel like I am playing so well... is that just selfish? i dunno i just really wish more people were showing up and taking the game more seriously but also having fun. ANother downer is the relationship between the men's and women's teams. The men seem to think we are a joke. Today the two men's teams and our team were all trying to play on the pool lawn and then of course not that many women showed up so the guys weren't too happy with us taking field space and then while standing between our sidelines they were making fun of us i guess. None of it I heard but one of our captains sure did. It's just frustrating to have them not be supportive and not respect us and overall that there isn't a good relationship between us and them. Some of the girls were really hurt, especially a few who are really good friends with a couple of them men. Sigh...At least later at dinner we (the women) were able to laugh about it a little. It just makes me sad and makes me look at some of the men that i consider friends a bit differently. There was a time when the men's and women's teams sat together after practices, and when we shared cars on the way to tournaments and both cheered for eachother during games. Instead of dwelling on it too long I try to keep a positive attitude and just remind myself that i was busting my ass during our practice today. even if i couldn't throw.

well now I'm going to go do my homework with Britta, in the commons, and have a beer. i *heart* beer.

St. Louis

after a hectic couple of days last week I finally got the chance to chill out after wednesday. Although I did not do as well on my exams as I had hoped no worries... the weekend finally came and I was home free. And... although I got to bum around Thursday I spent all of friday in class and getting ready for my trip to St. Louis. The car got down to school just fine, sent my brother on his way back home, went to my last class, had pizza there, then got ready to go to st. louis. and this is the trip...

We left around 4:30 in the afternoon. My car making a stop to drop off one of the cars and then we made the rest of the trip. It was kind of an awkward one, but fun nevertheless. Thankfully we did not get lost and the directions got us there. I kept from freaking out thanks to the abilities and calming talk of Kari in the front seat. once we hit st. louis there was the task of finding the church that we were staying at which freaked me out the most because I had no idea where we were going and it was taking longer than I thought it would. Finally we made it there and tried our best to get to sleep even though we probably woke everyone up a bunch of times. :-P oops.

Saturday we began play at 9 and we played ALLLLLLLL day! 5 games with no breaks although after playing the wisconsin team we basically had a break because they killed us. We ended up winning 3 and losing 2 that day. overall it was a lot of fun. And then oh the joy of relaxing... Much pizza was eaten and much relaxing and socializing was done. Heck I got two backrubs out of the whole deal. some went to the party and others well we just sat around the church and played games or watched tv. I made it to bed early only to wake up with a sore neck. These floors were pretty hard...

Day two of playing had better weather...much more sunny and fewer clouds. We played three games and only won 1 of them. The other two games were pretty intense many words were exchanged between us and the other teams... not very nice words ... we made it through the day though and it was quite fun nevertheless... two of the cars left that evening and those that were left, well we stayed in St. Louis for the night... We watched the men's team win the tournament and what a game it was... It's funny to watch the men play and see how different of a game it can be. It was definitely an intense game with many calls and heated words exchanged. Allie, Andrea, Leah, Britta, and I sat and watched the game and had a lot of fun doing so. Funniest part was watching the woman on the side lines get plowed over by one of our own guys. hahah. it was quite hilarious and you had to be there to see it. Her and the chair went tumbling, beer went flying...but she came out alright, no real harm done and barely and beer lost. Plus her dog behind her was unharmed as well. So the group of us finished watching, hooked back up with Kari and Melissa, and had four hours to waste in St. Louis before getting back to the church. So first food at Taco Bell because it's tradition, where we spent an hour or more i'm guessing just chatting and getting refills on soda. Then the Arch. For those who do not know... St. Louis's attraction is this big metal arch on the riverfront. A shitty riverfront no doubt but a really cool arch structure! we played around in the park taking random photos for probably another hour or so which left us with at least another hour to kill... so... why not get ice cream? That wasted some more time and gave us even more time to just hang out...which was really fun the whole night. Back at the church we were all able to claim couches to sleep on! Thank god for some comfort! We spent the rest of the evening hanging out. Britta found some very silly books in the children's library which she read to us... they were a series "learning about sex" and oh my were they ridiculous! I don't think the word sex was ever mentioned in the "why boys and girls are different" book. Basically this is how you get a baby... two people love eachother, they get married in a church, and then a little bit of prayer gets you pregnant and wal-la! a baby and a family! Really this book by-passed anything important to teach children about sex and so did the other book. Kari also read us a book about the Easter Bunny and whether he was real. That book totally went around the issue of the Easter Bunny and never really answered that question. Again quite ridiculous. Oh religion...i have no idea what I think about it these days.

The next morning we split ways with Leah and Britta who are traveling for the week back packing somewhere. Kari, Melissa, Allie, Andrea and I started off back to Minneapolis. We finally got on the road with the car full of gas by 8:30 and were actually out of St. Louis by 9. It was raining and it continued to rain for the whole trip minus a couple of hours. We made our way out of Missouri, and through Illinois up to Cedar Rapids, IA to drop off Kari and Melissa. Then there were the three of us continuing to Minneapolis. Happily we never got lost on the way. Thought for sure I screwed us over almost but no worries we made it. On our way out of Cedar Rapids we travled maybe an hour and then ate something, and got back on the road... the total hours of the trip... 11 hours including our stops...:-P bleh. it wasn't too bad of a trip... once we finally hit Minnesota we were SO happy! The girls did homework or slept most of the way and we just constantly listened to music to keep us otherwise entertained. I was finally home by about 7:30/8 that evening after dropping off Allie and Andrea. Oh god how good it felt to be out of the car!

No real plans for the rest of break. Have a hair appointment tomorrow but that's about it. Dad went to Utah today for work and so I won't get to see much of him, but I did get to chat with him last night and today on the way to the airport. I spent the day sitting on the couch and feeding myself with unhealthy things...:-) I figure I can after spending two days running around all day...oh it was fun... i felt really good playing this weekend, like I was actually in shape a little and that I played some good games. Anyway that's about all... nothnig else really going on.. will spend the next few days getting senior paper stuff together, hanging out with my sister and maybe some friends who are around the cities. but for now more relaxing...:-)

oh god! i looked for jobs online today!
Granted I went to the the career center the other day to figure how to get on top of things, and well i guess I have... nothing serious yet, but there are jobs out there that I can apply to and i think i would like. Although I kept looking and felt more of a need to want to be a therapist. i can't get those jobs with out at least a masters. Ugh!

More and more I think about how I'd like to go to Australia again and just live there. I'm sure they have jobs too. but I don't plan to leave the country for quite some time... i need to save some money... and why would i want to leave the country if mates are coming to visit here?! :-) it's coming soon and i can't wait!

so hey, it's been awhile. my bad. It's been a busy week or so. :-P Anyway read on...

First of all St. Patrick's Day: What a holiday. I'm not Irish, at least I don't think but i tried my best to enjoy the finer things we consider Irish. As in, irish car bombs, guiness, and the movie Boondock Saints. I spent the day in class but 4 pm rolled around and off to the bottle shop to pick up some beer. Came back, did dinner, and then spent the evening with six fun friends! A group of us girls got together and did car bombs, jello shots and played a drinking game to Boondock Saints! SO FUN! I have the photos to prove it too! So yeah, it was great. I spent the later part of the evening on the computer with Mel hopefully not talking too ridiculously... and then i was passed out by 12 or so. :-) Not a very long day of drinking but a good evening of it no doubt. I'd put up photos but let's be serious most of you that read this have facebook where i have put up the photos already. They are quite funny.

now this week has been alright considering. It's Thursday morning and i am pretty much done for the week! YES! took two exams yesterday that went fine. not as well as i would like but they went fine. Thank god they are done and so is my last assignment. Happily my soc professor cancelled class today as long as we all did an assignment which was just a revision of our research outlines. Awesome! So I'm done. I feel soooo relaxed and it's wonderful. I leave tomorrow for St. Louis to play frisbee! w00t! Today's tasks include catching up on reading and working on my senior paper, and also the hope of getting my computer fixed. Another reason why i have not written in while... broken computer! :-( stupid thing. I wish my life didn't depend so much on computers. Sigh... oh well we'll see... After st louis it's back home for what i hope to be a relaxing week!And really that's allthat i have for now.